Fatithfilled Reminders

Have courage for the great sorrows of life and patience for the small ones; and when you have laboriously accomplished your daily task, go to sleep in peace. God is awake.
Victor Hugo

Some folks believe in the idea of life after death and I hope they're right... but it's also important, I think, to believe in life BEFORE death.
Ron Atchison

Live your life so that the fear of death can never enter your heart. When you arise in the morning, give thanks for the morning light. Give thanks for your life and strength. Give thanks for your food and for the joy of living. And if perchance you see no reason for giving thanks, rest assured the fault is in yourself.
Chief Tecumseh, Shawnee Indian Chief

“If we have been pleased with life, we should not be displeased with death, since it comes from the hand of the same master.”

Michelangelo

“Perhaps they are not the stars,but rather openings in Heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy.”

Eskimo Legend

“Life is a great sunrise. I do not see why death should not be an even greater one.”

Vladimir Nobokov

"I wanted a perfect ending... Now, I've learned the hard way that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity."

Gilda Radner, 1946-1989

“Whoever brought me here will have to take me home.” Rumi

Ecclesiastes 12: 7

and the dust returns to the ground it came from, and the spirit returns to God who gave it.

Call the drummers, timbal beaters, and tambourine players. March toward my grave dancing thus, Happy, gay, intoxicated; with hands clapping, So that people would know that the friends of God Go happy and smiling toward the place of meeting.- Rumi

Whoever brought me here will have to take me home.- Rumi

"Faith goes up the stairs love has built and looks out the window which hope has opened..." Charles Spurgeon

Drumsound rises on the air,its throb, my heart.A voice inside the beatsays, "I know you're tired,but come. This is the way."
Jeláluddín Rúmí(trans. by Coleman Barks

So Again...

So again I mourn ... this time the tears don't hold behind the dam. This time they fall in a torrential downpour that swamps my heart and makes it float and bob on the surface of a rolling seafoam crested wave. It slams the shoreline and dumps me in the sand.

Death... sometimes it is a welcome guest when one has been beaten and eaten alive by that vicious villain that cancer is. My dear cousin's flesh was consumed by it veracious appetite. Yet her spirit beheld, bestowed, belongs to the Almighty alone. The epitome of gentleness. Of grace. Of forgiveness. Of faithfulness supreme. Who's arms embrace spoke more love than most peoples words. Who's spirit so filled with the presence of God Himself. The kind of quiet nature that makes hard souls sigh and soften to the beauty of life. The kind of soul that makes unbelievers... KNOW that God is more real than what is seen.

I simply feel shattered... that this most tender woman will no longer grace this earthly sod! A lifetime together... it isn't very long you know. Her dear family was there... watching her spirit return to God who gave it. They know... they have peace in their deepest sorrow. It is well with their soul... even though this pain is new and hurts so cuttingly. It is still so well with their souls.
A lifetime together will come once again when each are also birthed into Eternity and swaddled in spirit cloth.

Such distress... such a blessing ... such is this part of life.

The twinkles in your eyes as they crinkle up with glee

Your gentle, tender arms embrace that infiltrates our hearts

Faith that went beyond all borders and boundaries.

A spirit filled with God Himself.

A true temple of His Love.

You thrived and thrived through difficult days

Sustained by the Heavenlies, sustaining us all.

With dawn you returned from where you began.

One by one we shall meet you there... whenever we can.

My heart cracked this morning when I heard you have gone

but it was quickly filled in with your forever bond

Tonight I will go out and look up at the sky

I will thank our Savior

for YOU

the sweet precious you who has embraced me my whole life

with the most caring, gentleness of anyone I have known.

I give thanks that you are in Peace secure

I just wish it had been different

cause this world is at a true loss

without you here.

I love you. I will hold your family close as they need those arms of love to extend back around them in strength , courage and the tender gentleness that they will recognize as given from you, to me.

Lovingly always

Lion~*

What does anger speak?

What does anger speak? For me... it screams of disappointment... loss... injury... confinement...disrespect... loss of communication...helplessness... exclusion...intense sorrow... a pain so deep and scarred over yet festering...

I am angry. Can you guess? I feel myself vibrate with it. It clenches my jaw till it aches. It fuses my body into a steel pipeline! I do not care for the feeling... yet I am enjoying the right I have to feel it. It brings to me a great understanding of a yet to be surveyed territory of my heart. This is the place that has invited me to visit on multiple occasions the last few years and I keep turning down the request. I think I will accept this time. See where it takes me. What hollows are securing hidden venues for me? What am I to find when I look into my own eyes?

What will ripen within me as I walk across the threshold and down this very lonely corridor?

Am I really that needed? Or am I an emotional Fix?

Somebody rescue me!

Phone calls- emails - IM's.... I am inundated with needs, sorrows, words that regurgitate into my brain making it swell like a sea sponge. I am the listening ear, sounding board, backsplash at the sink! At times I can deal with it all very well. Other times... that would be now... I am just too tired to contend with the continual bombardment. Am I so treasured on a pedestal that I look like I can hold up the world? Our world? Their world? My own? It is a pretty shoddy spot they set me upon. Can you see the base of this thing wobble? I hate heights and I never asked to be here. Nice firm flat ground for me - thank you very much! I had never considered myself special.... no ... the very opposite infact!

I have my safe places to "lay low". Where I can curl up in safety and vulnerability. But for the most part... I am considered the " strong one". That I should have my own needs and worries... How LUDICROUS could I be? Only a bare few honestly see me as I am. The "raw n real" has appeal for only a few brave souls to gaze upon. Truth is... I am only courageous enough to have a select population look deep enough! And many have not the ability to comprehend or attend outside their own realm of breathe in and breathe out.

This is indeed ok with me. I understand when I simply need my own space. When I am weary of 'being there', instead of just being. When I don't really want to hear anymore bad news. When I adamantly refuse to be emotionally vampirized by others. It is right and proper that I have controlled healthy boundaries. Just as I do not expect anyone to uphold and be my continual emotional nourishment... I cannot be used this way either.

So I will rescue myself.

I will limit the bombardment upon my heart. I will choose to answer the phone or use the machine. I will email back if or when I am able. I will be invisible or online when I am feeling like it. To save my own heart... my own energy reserves... I will be the encouraging supporter of those I love and care deeply about... but I will not be eaten up greedily and then left panting to provide another meal of Lion~*Wisdom a'la mode.

And Again I Say "Goodbye"

I keep being told that everyone deals with death differently.Yes, this is true. No one can understand how another is comprehending in heart and mind what is so achingly painful.

Grief, that deep sorrow, anger, lonely hearted space that follows death. It is no stranger to me. Infact it's been like a wild beast nipping my heels and rarely allowing me to stop to gasp in air. I have learned to deal with death's heart grip in what I consider very healthy, helpful ways. I have had so much practice at it. For so many years grief was my punisher. Then it became a constant stalker. Hounding me - trying to break my spirit.

I will not allow it to overtake me. I know that in death, there is life Eternal. Hope reaches beyond the hope that breathes and beats the heart. In death I still hold loved ones who are forever planted within my heart. I win - I get to keep all that is precious to me. I am stronger and I have a Conquerer of my enemy and persecuter. Within each loss of those returning to their Source of Life... I find deeper meaning and assurance for life's true value. With every "Goodbye"... there is also a "Hello!"

I am weary, yet vibrant. I am sad, yet I am resiliant. I am broken, yet I mend and bend without falling to tiny bits. I no longer say an agonizing "Farewell", but a deeply knowing " Till we meet again!!!" Safe and freed from the tumult of this world I give thanks for life and love shared and shared well!

And again I say “Goodbye”

Snowflakes softly fallen
Yet such power contained inside their “Whoosh”

Memories sweetly gathered
Yet bittersweet in their trail down the cheek!

Eyes crystal blue and twinkling light
Closed never again shall they be seen seeing.

Wooden footsteps clicking
Silent upon the rocky path of your life.

Your heart has been stilled
Mine rushes and nearly stops on the edge!

God warmly says “Hello”
As again I say “Goodbye”

With much love for the many times shared with love between our families
With much sorrow at the loss of one so vibrant and truly gentle of soul.

Love always Dick ~ God be with you till we meet again!
Love Lion~*LovingYouInSpiritPaw