The Forge

The Forge

His soul was a blazing inferno with possibilities
To forge together with solidity
The pieces, the players, the potential
Of his life

Yet he yawned
Rolled over
And slept

As molten metal puddled inches deep
Congealing into shackles
Locking him into false imprisonment
Hindering lives

Hear the call
For awakening
Spirit passion

Put the bellows to the sparking connection
That zaps the heart and races the pulse
Ignite prospective fervors of love
Welding souls

Rise up stretching
Striking the forge
With precision

Love Lion~*
November 22,2007

Do all the good you can,

in all the ways you can,

to all the souls you can,

in every place you can,

at all the times you can,

With all the zeal you can,

as long as ever you can.

John Wesley

DOING
GOOD
WORKS!

Refuse to fall down.

If you cannot refuse to fall down,

refuse to stay down.

If you cannot refuse to stay down,

lift your heart toward heaven,

and like a hungry beggar,

ask that it be filled,

and it will be filled.

You may be pushed down.

You may be kept from rising.

But no one can keep you

from lifting your heart

toward heaven.
Clarissa Pinkola Estés

~

There truly is NO excuse for not fulfilling the potential of your human birthright! There is no lack of knowledge. There is no reason to shirk the needs of your soul... or those of others. Life is so precious and needs embraced fully! What good is crying over a pine box or ashes of urn.... with 'should've, would've, could've, when NOW is the day to Live and Live Well! When your days are done... let people rejoice that you filled life with LOVE... that you burned in zealous light and kindled fires everywhere you went!

Love

Integrity

Kindness

Respect

Wisdom

Reaching

Boldly

Enfolding

Building

!

No Excuse

Just Passion

~

Love Lion~*Go Forth And Be Who You Are Meant To Be... Unhindered

Kindness

In the midst of global crises such as pollution, wars and famine, kindness may be too easily dismissed as a 'soft' issue, or a luxury to be addressed after the urgent problems are solved. But kindness is the greatest need in all those areas -- kindness toward the environment, toward other nations, toward the needs of people who are suffering. Until we reflect basic kindness in everything we do, our political gestures will be fleeting and fragile.
~Bo Lozoff

Kindness means a great deal to me. Purposeful or random... it changes lives! We require a great deal of it to reach our full potential. To have a healthy image of ourself and to offer helpful truth to others. There often doesn't seem to be enough being doled out. Yet the payoff for all is beyond comprehension!

It requires less character to discover the faults of others than is does to tolerate them.
- J. Petit Senn

Faults... so often a person just isn't aware... hasn't had the life experience or understanding to know differently... or has wounds suffocating their own healing process...
How much better is a bandage of kindness than wrathful insult to injury ?

I will permit no man to narrow and degrade my soul by making me hate him.
~ Booker T. Washington

Faults in rock are due to stress and a breaking open... I think it is much the same with us. Stressors make us crack in our soul also... the fissure needs filled with wisdom and only comes with kindnesses received!

People seldom improve when they have no other model but themselves to copy.
- Oliver Goldsmith

"Shall we make a new rule of life from tonight:
always to try to be a little kinder than is necessary?"
~James Barrie

Become even more of a hero in life ... be outrageously kind You could provoke an epidemic!!!!
Love Lion~*

Each small act of kindness reverberates across great distances and spans of time, affecting lives unknown to the one whose generous spirit was the source of the good echo, because kindness is passed on and grows each time it is passed, until simple courtesy becomes an act of selfless courage years later and far away.
-Dean Koontz,

Celebration!

I discovered a poem I wrote a year ago. Sometimes I feel absolutely dreadful about myself. Perhaps that is why this little poem was sitting on the shelf... waiting... to say, "See! Do you see what you have seen and been and are!!!!" It all goes so much deeper than flesh............

Celebration!

Beauty
Never before have the lines on her face been defined
Sparkles clear in forest green of eye perform above
Jump of nose in perfect exhale
Blossom of lip petals part is approval
Contours
Sweeping down curves and angles that make her woman
Standing with delicate strength and pristine determination
Before the world of mirror
Consuming the bountiful supply of air that fills her lungs
And she sings
Sings
In celebration!
Exalting in the melody of joy that escapes
The deep vault of truth
Spilling the secret
That was never told
~
How very enough

Yes

How very enough

Is

She

~.*.~ ~*
Lion~*
© November27,2006

Love Lion~*

I am letting my soul sing Why not!

Bulwark of My Soul

"The emotional virus lives

and thrives

in the gap between expectations and perceived reality."

Doc Childre and Bruce Cryer,

Chaos to Coherance

Now doesn't that give one much to think upon! I have had repeat infections of this virus. It is a hard one to shake and no medicine can be swallowed to alleviate the symptoms!

So I cling to the walls of truth where authenticity adheres untrammeled. It is getting past the rubbish that clogs one's brain which is no easy endeavor! That gap is filled with so much prattle! Words not intended to restrain our emotional growth, yet creating stagnate ponds of sensitivity. Even mere looks put constriction upon hearts inhibiting growth.

I hear my voices echoing back to that first cry. I hear everything in that gap filled cavern of mine. There wasn't love enough to inoculate me from the viral abyss. Though of course no one is immune! Time has provided a prescription for this malady... maturity infuses the soul with antibodies

If we had no gap... what would we be filled with!

Oh Indeed!

We would be filled with arousing wellbeing, but know not why it is so blissful.

So I shall be thankful for the infirmity that saturated my emotions.

For now I know to cling to the bulwark of my soul.

I tell you, deep inside you is a fountain of bliss, a fountain of joy. Deep inside your center core is truth, light, love, there is no guilt there, there is no fear there. Psychologists have never looked deep enough.

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar

I believe in the Peace that passes understanding. I am kissed by it daily.The Carpenter building my spirit's destiny lays fresh stones one upon the other mortaring them together firmly, squeezing that gap.

~~~~~

The photo is of Cathedral Mountain. I lived at the very base of it long ago! The picture doesn't do it justice. When you look up at it on a brilliant day... it looks just like a fortified castle! You can see the windows and doors... and the fairy angels flitting about if you really try! :) Fact is... the whole top inside of this mountain has been carved out by miners of old. It has an enormous cavern within, yet stands strong and magnificent by its strong walls. Just like you... just like me!

The Bulwark providing our security and truth... our value... these are not infected.

Love Lion~*

dark of night

dark of night
not to be feared
calm
eyes upturned to distant hope
frail light gently kissing her brow
sensing
the tremor in her bones
not from cold
anticipation
for the wind begins to blow

and certainly will dislodge
incense
of her prayers that got caught
on the edge of a star

Love Lion~* Oct 28 2007

And the world becomes kinder

I watched the movie created from the book, " Goodbye Mr Chips" , by James Hilton. It was a wonderful, terrible, excellent story about life and being a person of deep integrity and honor! One line in the show had me scrambling for paper and pen!

" When I stopped judging myself so harshly, the world became kinder. "

I must confess... I've gathered up my accuser's words since before I can remember. Where the tongues who spoke... also forgot. I held their words upon the precipice of my soul... allowing them... one by one to dive and splash into my emotional chamber and pump through me like poison.

I knew who I was. I knew I was not those cruel syllables. But hearing them caused confusion that I was somehow fautly. Someone had to pay penance... didn't they? So I took on the roll. I took on lies and lost myself in the forgotten rubbish tossed so carelessly.

"Love yourself! Take care of yourself! Self-respect, Dignity!" When these words started washing over me, I was at a loss! I did... didn't I? But alas, No! I judged myself very hard, very, very hard on the witness of unthinking individuals. I spent most of my life alone. Very meagre of friends. Locked in walls built to protect, but sheltering pain with no escape route! It was confusing to have duality of emotions. I cared so much for others, but couldn't allow anyone to know what lay so achingly within me.

When I took time to hear myself... I was agast! I got to work seeking out the burdens. While Hands much larger than I, crushed my walls to rubble and dust! I began to see me and not the hideous refuse that marred my soul's visage. I began to fall in love with who my Lord said I was. No other opinion mattered. Their reminice faded like fog when the Sun breaks through!

Some days I still have the residual effects of fresh floggings and I try to step back from their flashing whip... but I am not always quick enough and get scratched and gouged. I think it impossible to sidestep when being blindsided!!! sigh. But I know a great Healer when this happens.

I have been judged harshly and I have judged myself even harder because of it! When I stopped ( or at least became increasingly aware so I could stop) kindness came to me. Even more than this... where I had given my best to others... I suddenly had much better to give!

It is no cliche' to love others as you love yourself. If love for self is limited, then it goes for certain that your love for others is also bound to limited knowledge. Yet to love me, I had to first know I was loved by Another. God's love gave me truth no earthly vessel can.

When I stopped judging myself so unwisely with unedited bluther... I also learned to be much more gracious to others. To understand the cause of my 'effects'... made me seek a new perspective of those before me. Truly, this harsh world has gained a gentler edge!

Even ten years later I still feel quite lonely. Perhaps that is because I have SO much more space to be refilled!

Love Lion~*

"Our own heart, and not other men's opinions, forms our true honor." - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

"If you accept the expectations of others, especially negative ones, then you never will change the outcome." - Michael Jordan

Re-examine all you have been told... dismiss what insults your soul." -Walt Whitman

Whosoever may torment you, harass you, confound you, or upset you, is a teacher. Not because they're wise, but because you seek to become so." -Mike Dooley

Gates

Gates, they keep in and keep out!

We all have emotional gates. We let some through to venture into our soulful garden. Others are barred at the outskirts only glimpsing what might lay beyond!


I believe that at the heart of all persons is the desire to be known... acknowledged! Those who hide behind the highest walls with solid gates... want to be found most of all. Our gardens are meant to be shared and seeds exchanged and grown. And we all need help with weeding every so often!


Proverbs 19:22 What a person desires is unfailing love ; better to be poor than a liar.


This world holds little real unconditional love. Yet it is the very Heart and Core of our Creator. I have faith in God's unfailing love. People, all people require love to be sucessful in this life. Yet lies corrupt our vital sustainance. We were born with the image of God imbedded in our spirit. To be loved and to love. To have relationships that empower one another to respect and honor all persons. To enable people to grow and mature in their talants and goals. We are meant to uphold one another... not lash out at those we love... or those we fear because they look, sound or simply live in a foreign land.


We don't have to 'like' what some people choose to do. Some willingly defy our purpose in life. They do not have love in their hearts. They have sought out dark shadows to reside in where the truth cannot shine upon them. Perhaps they were born into shadow. Hate the sin, not the sinner. Now there is a difficult truth to follow. Love is expressed in a great many ways. Sometimes the only thing you can see in another person is the fact that they are a 'person' who though vile, is to be pitied for how lost in lies and destruction they are steeped. I believe that pity is indeed a form of love that can can provoke words of prayer if nothing else for such individuals.

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” Jalal ad -Din Rumi


Ultimately, we have just one moral duty: to reclaim large areas of peace in ourselves, more and more peace, and to reflect it towards others. And the more peace there is in us, the more peace there will be in our troubled world. Etty Hillesum


We are not meant to judge one another. We are meant to strive to be love and to help lift one another up to this challenge. We all know right from wrong. What do I let in through my gate? What grows in me? What grows in you? One source... many outcomes... yet still... only one destiny meant for ALL.


As I pluck up my weeds, I will try very hard not to throw them over the wall to implant in your garden space. Please be so kind to those to the right and left encircling you also!


Love Lion~*

Birth of a Victorious Spirit

"We are not born all at once, but by bits. The body first, and the spirit later; and the birth and growth of the spirit, in those who are attentive to their own inner life, are slow and exceedingly painful. Our mothers are racked with the pains of our physical birth; we ourselves suffer the longer pains of our spiritual growth." -- Mary Antin

I think Mary Antin very wise in her conclusion about our spiritual birth and growth. It is slow and exceedingly painful... lasts a lifetime! It is also richly rewarding to be maturing into our destined potential in this mortal life! So often I've attempted to avoid the pain… guess what happens? It only gets worse! If it is time for birthing… it is time for birthing! I had 4 sons and all varied in their arrival time. They also differ in their sprouting upward to tower over me! None of it can be avoided. Hesitation only gathers the velocity to which it will ultimately happen. This is why some grow steady forward… and some seemingly stagnate suddenly get thrown forward like a sling shot! And all say, " WOW" Have they ever changed!!!

You can outdistance that which is running after you, but not what is running inside you. - Rwandan saying

Do you remember having growing pains in your legs as a child? I sure did! I would wake up crying in pain and my Mom would try to soothe them. It wasn’t fun… but I did manage to grow up to be a soaring 5’5-½”!!! With all the childhood sufferings of growing up my Mom would say “ You have to suffer to be beautiful!"

Well point is… all life’s happenings especially the difficult ones bring true growing pains to our spirit. The pains demand we seek understanding and wisdom to relieve the pain as we stretch up to our maturity! We hold so much within our soul and most times no one has a clue what strain we are going through. I cannot tell you how many times I was told. “ You look so great!” Yet I was steeped in sheer agony of soul and feeling very alone! No one saw that. I never let anyone know. ' Alone' makes it harder to be birthed in our spirit because it bars us from accepting benefits of wisdom from others. Growth comes easier with encouragement and loving care! I hadn't known I deserved that. Sometimes I still forget!

"If people knew how hard I worked to get my mastery, it wouldn't seem so wonderful after all." - Michelangelo

You are a masterpiece! You may be hurting, but take heart! That pain is developing in you gifts, wisdom and precious abilities that you need… that this world needs from you! Don’t fight it. Embrace it! Seek the balm of kindred friends who will empower you with the truth they see in you and you in them! Perhaps if Michelangelo had friends like that… he wouldn’t have had such a hard time ?!?!?!? His mastery may have been even more celebrated!!!

Ultimately, we have just one moral duty: to reclaim large areas of peace in ourselves, more and more peace, and to reflect it towards others. And the more peace there is in us, the more peace there will be in our troubled world. Etty Hillesum

And we know how desperately this world need more peace! I need it and I know you need it too! Sometimes it just takes us a bit of time to realize how much more is available to us. Life is not about being victims to life’s pain. It is about gathering wisdom, understanding, courage, thanks and loving relationships to become Victors in spite of that pain! You were born with potential. If you have forgotten… reclaim what is yours. Be of courage and fulfill your purpose… it is undoubtedly connected to another’s moral duty also!

With love Lion~*

Be the one you were Divinely designed to be. Accept what come to you because you are amazing.You can do it...we can... we truly can!!!

Sometimes I get lost

Sometimes I get lost


The past takes up hours of today


Faces that cannot be reached tug at my soul


Not one tear falls





Sometimes I forget to breathe


The past needs no inhale to survive


But my muscle ache must exhale soon


But I wait a moment





Sometimes I want to scream


To holler out my soul's burden


and empty my veins of this poison


stagnating heart seams





Sometimes I long to be known


For just one to sit with me


And bestow compassion


Yet who indeed...




Love Lion~*




Sometimes I need to remember so I can relinquish... how immensely tight my grip is. I have gone numb with the effort. How crazy is that. I could counsel so many with happy results... yet a simple breath and lifting of my will... I have no courage for.

Sometimes it is just a memory... and sometimes it is someone so much more. I found my brothers best friends. One who was there those torturous hours of evil fate. I know now all that happened. Where my sight ended at the dark corner of snowflakes... another gave my mind sight to see and know it all... and I have gone numb. Just as I did many years ago... I am not quite sure what I am supposed to do with it... but I know I have this huge gripping within me... and I am afraid of letting go... yet the wisdom in me knows it is what I need.

Closure... a door is not really closed till you let go of the knob... is it? But it has NOT been the good that has crowded in on me all these years. Not the happy memories some are allowed to keep. Mine is filled with murderous sorrow and it has both made and tainted me. I quit breathing when I lost him. He was my soft place to trust. He protected me. He cared when no one else did. He said "Bye, see you tomorrow!" But when I did see him... he was no longer there.

I thought I had dealt with it all so well. Till coincidence brought a fateful few my way. And now I know things I was never told. And I feel more alone than I did then... for even tears won't befriend me now.

There are people whom one loves immediately and forever. Even to know they are alive in the world is quite enough.

Nancy Spain

And when they are gone... nothing is ever quite enough

What is new?

Sometimes I wonder what I am doing. When asked what is new... I feel myself sink. New???... new is each day... and each moment... but there is an old load that weighs so much. That 'new' stuff that adventures my way has made it heavier...


I delete it all from view and pack it into cold storage... but that I am afraid has been permafrosting a portion of my heart. Rather forfeits my desire for integrity.


I have lost the tears that should have soaked my pillow. What is new? Not that! It is just that so much has happened that is so blasted harsh this year... stressors so high they take the breath from me and I can only pray silently... and in my weakened soul... I know He hears.


Last week a friend of mine said, " You are always positive!" Well, no, I am not. I just try to find the positives because I am trying to outrun the negatives. But it is futile... because I can't outrun what has taken up residence in me. I can only STOP... and tidy up room by room.

"When you slow down, step back a moment and put things in perspective, you can then move on with more efficiency. It only takes a moment to adapt and control how you respond."
Doc Childre,

When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you till it seems as though you could not hold on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.Harriet Beecher Stowe, 1811-1896

"The key is to not resist or rebel against emotions or to try to get around them by devising all sorts of tricks; but to accept them directly, as they are."
- Takahisa Kora

I do not believe that sheer suffering teaches.If suffering alone taught, all the world would be wise,since everyone suffers.To suffering must be added mourning,understanding, patience, love, openness,and a willingness to remain vulnerable.Anne Morrow Lindbergh, 1906-2001

M. Scott Peck: The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.

No coward soul is mine,
No trembler in the
world's storm - troubled sphere:
I see Heaven's glories shine,
And Faith shines equal,
arming me from Fear.

Emily Jane Bronte

"Challenges make you discover things about yourself that you never really knew. They're what make the instrument stretch -what makes you go beyond the norm."
Cicely Tyson

If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people. Virgina Wolfe

I love these songs by Annie Lennox!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wXBhBDCdiSY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-iX1CQJ_0l8

"Don't forget that little emotions are the great captains of our lives."
-- Vincent Van Gogh

There... my pep talk to myself for the day!

Now I shall go outside and tend my garden... and unburden some of the weight within me.

Lion~*

Can nothing be done??? really!!! hmmmm

Well, it has been awhile... and I don't know that even now I have anything worth saying, sharing or being heard. It isn't that nothing has occurred... I have had quite a bit happen... like a deeper assurance and conviction to be faithful to Truth! Like a stronger commitment to do everything it takes to learn more about what love means and to live it well! Like discovering through the help of many medical practitioners just what a healthy wreck I truly am! ... I have seen 8 Doctors in the last 1 1/2 yrs. Have a couple more to go still. Though I have received some great validation and important information... ALL of them come to one final conclusion... there is really nothing any of them can do to help me. I have been pronounced to be a well balanced individual who has some very difficult ailments that are not going to get any better... and many that will indeed... get much worse as I age.

Knowledge is Power!!!! sigh... Yes, it is helpful to know all that I do about what is going on with me... but I also feel extremely powerless! I had hoped someone could do something! I have been avoiding it since seeing the last specialist 3 weeks ago... but I think I really need to mourn once again... the loss of what I haven't had for nearly my whole life... and medically speaking... never will know. This isn't the end of it... it is just the 're'beginning of realizing the harsh impact of my reality. I wondered why I kept getting worse when what I am told I have is not progressive... yet I am continuing down a slippery slope that someone cruelly greased so I can't climb back up!

DAMMMMMMM!!!!

Until January no one looked into what Dr's found when I was a teenager...those xrays told a story no one wanted to read in many lonnng years!!! and THIS is what has provided me with the ever worsening of body. I have been contained in a vessel defective from conception... and so now... when they all say, "There is nothing we can do for you at this time!"... well they never could... and never can.

All I can do is maintain a healthy life and keep myself moving as best I can. It is all I have done for YEARS so nothing new there ... I am going to have to adjust a few things though... I will do all I can to avoid being in the vast majority who end up with serious surgeries. That would displease me greatly.

I used to have a reoccurring dream... I would be running through different places and times of my past... always there were 2 lines of people on each side of me... some people unknown and some significantly recognized... some cheered me and others reached out to divert my attention, but I would never stop... I kept running. After dreaming it... OH!!! I wanted to run so much! I know the true significance of the dream was not to become a marathon jogger... but to spiritually keep my focus and run the race set before me called Life! I could have been sidetracked multiple times... I have been on occassion... but never for long! I haven't been able to really run since I was 13 ... but I tell you ... I do know a thing or two about Living Life Well! Truth be told... that though it is indeed disappointing to be told over and over that nothing can be done medically... my journey has taken a turn of deepening contentment these last 2 months alone... and that is what makes all the difference in this life of mine!

So I will do myself the favor of feeling my sadness and be comforted by my many joys!!!

Love Lion~*WeakYetStrongPaw

waking and sleeping

Somewhere in my life... I fell asleep. A very deep deep sleep that I cannot wake up from. In my dreams I must be a painter but my dreams are not the ones I would have painted. The characters are of my choosing, but the lines ... some of them are all wrong. They travel in spirals and quick elbows that I just would never draw. I take careful strokes and never mix up colors into an ugly mess. Yet in my dreams, the paintings start beautiful until someone splashes them with black muck. Never is there a gentle portrait with kindness on faces bright. Tears streak the paintings that were pretty. Nightmares make my teeth and fists clench. I startle, but keep dreaming on. I would like to be woken up now. To gather the canvas and put an iron to it. Splash it with thinner and begin anew. I keep shaking myself... but I cannot wake more than I am.

She had accepted the challenge ~ to know me

" Once, again, one of my Friday Friends helped me put my life back in perspective. She knew what was really bugging me, because I had given her permission- and she had accepted the challenge - to know me. So when I shared my lowest of lows with her, her response enlarged my capacity to accept myself. She took what was a moment of complete ugliness (I'm not good at anything) and turned it into one of healing laughter. " Dr Leslie Parrott ~ from her book ~ you matter more than you think... what a woman needs to know about the difference she makes.



"She knew what was really bugging me, because I had given her permission - and she had accepted the challenge - to know me. "

Three years ago I was led... yes led... to find some new wisdom in managing my life. All places I had attempted to go before, they were people who "thought" they knew me or just "couldn't" know me. Even those who think that they do... they often tell me their perception of who I am and even argue with me over just who I really am, what I feel, how I handle things and you know what.... it really does tick me off. I honestly am not interested anymore in what most people perceive or more appropriately - misperceive how my thoughts work out in my head and into actions or reactions. I have very rarely ever been understood. I have even let people think they were right about me... just to not have to debate the issue when the truth is... they really are not willing to listen to who I am because their own 'wisdom' expressed about me,was more important than me! Yes, this led to much aloneness in my life. I often wondered and still do if I ever wish to trust anyone enough to have this courage Leslie Parrott has... to give permission ~ to know me. But three years ago when I left my comfort zone... I found someone precious.

Maggie,a lay counsellor. The first time I met her, I knew something was very different about her. And I felt secure in talking to her. And something happened. I gave someone permission to "know me". Maggie asked me simple questions and sometimes in her office, but more often later alone, I found some very complex answers. The day after I saw her I began to write and the writings and poems that my soul has sung out have allowed me to know this woman that I am. Words came out of me no one has ever heard ... not even me! The unanswered Why? How? Who? When's??? They became known and still the process continues. I have truly enjoyed this getting to know me. By the simple questions that gently opened a closed door in my emotional soul.

I have not seen Maggie professionally for 2 1/2 yrs. We became such good friends that it was no longer possible, or wanted to continue in the lay counselling. We share back and forth the happenings of our lives and pray for one another in our concerns. Maggie is quite different from anyone else I have a face to face relationship with. She validates me and celebrates the authenticity of my life. She never tells me that I am "this or that". She still puts before me simple questions and I still find the complexities that really are quite simple within me!!! With Maggie, I feel ... respected, honored and I do feel known... she never tried to give her own perceptions... she listened and heard the truth. She is also the only one I've shared the most intimate of my writing with. And she celebrates what each word means in liberating my soul from its guarded fortress. Maggie is a gift I didn't know I would receive when I cried out in need... "Lord, help me!" He helped both of us with a gentle friendship blessed by His heart!

I didn't know those 3 years ago how much I needed to know myself on a different level. The depths I have delved into... I am truly speechless... meeting the very heart and core of myself in such raw honesty... with no fear, only a need to know and find answers. God knew what I needed to know. His love for me is astounding and He wanted me to feel it and know who I am and fall in love. So now... I have finally come to realize that what others misperceive about me... speaks about themselves. And it doesn't matter how many people don't understand or know me. I am indeed known and I know myself. This is an assurance I gladly cling to and cherish.

I found these lines from an online conversation I kept :

betsy: what is God saying to you, Lion~*?
betsy: help others
betsy: use YOUR gifts?
Lion~*: Actually Betsy ---- God is saying " Take the time to hear who is within you - she needs your love and acceptance more than you have realized! Listen well and then go on and just be....

Seems rather prophetic now to read that ... it was from Feb2004

Love Lion~*JustBeJustMePaw

"People travel to wonder at the height of the mountains, at the huge waves of the seas, at the long course of the rivers, at the vast compass of the ocean, at the circular motion of the stars, and yet they pass by themselves without wondering."St. Augustine, 354 430Early Christian Priest, Author

Women need solitude in order to find again the true essence of themselves.

Anne Lindbergh

"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek & find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it."~ Rumi.

Jalai ed-Din Rumi

( Beloved Persian Poet )

That which God said to the rose,

and caused it to laugh in full-blown beauty,

He said to my heart

,and made it a hundred times more beautiful.

And the days go bye...

One day, two day, dusty new day.


I've had just a very few say to me, "Happy New Year!!!" I have felt a mix of what to say in return. The old year had very little happy and though I hope this new one will be different... I am extremely cautiously optimistic!
I did have some great things happen personally. The deepening understanding I have of myself from this past year... this is a great thing! I feel more resiliant... even though I had many crushing days. Much to my dismay and calm assurance... my heart that has been shattered on many occassion... it continues to beat strongly!!! What a surprise this has been for me! I have longed for years for someone to understand me and God has shown me myself with a depth of understanding I truly needed. " Love others as I have loved you" " Love others as yourself". I believe this was a great hinderance in my life... Not understanding the magnificence of God's love bestowed on me... and not understanding my own self and loving who I am... I accepted others frills and failures far easier than my own... yet how could I really love without being loved, knowing love, respecting myself in all areas of my soul as God does, so I could indeed feel the same for others. I am a student in this love affair of God, me and all of the *you*.
I know at the start of this new year what I don't want. I know some of what I do hope for, but I have no idea what will be. The days that have gone "Bye"... I gladly let them go! The wisdom I hold, while sorrows I am attempting to let go. For this past year, though gathering together my soul... has also scattered it before me to be tred upon... and it has not been an easy walk.
I don't know if I even make sense in this jumble of tumbling thought... Truth is... I feel anxious and on the verge of spilling a torent of tears and also a resiliant hope that boggles my mind and often teases me with its perky presence and inability to quit! :) ... happy new year... HAPPY NEW YEAR... sigh!!!

There is going to be some happy, sad, angry, glad, hysterical, miracle, confusion and the ever present calm assurance that follows me everywhere! What will be... will be for nothing can stop what is... But may I choose wisely what I will be, do, act and react... may the calm assurance I have been given birth my spirit from the cocoon it has been protected within and aid me in the mission of my life's purpose and fulfillment.

Tonight... I feel the intensity to weep and sleep for this new year needs a cleansing from the old...

Love and Hope ... these are mine!
Lion~*SteppingUpToTheEntranceOfMySoulSoThePastCanBeLetGoPaw